I was going through my morning routine of looking for video game news. As usual, I went through This Week in Video Games, VGC, then Push Square. Now when I reached Push Square, there's this featured article, titled "Going Platinum: Stray Is Probably the Only Game I've Speedran for a Trophy".

Huh. Must be a slow news day at Push Square if Stray, a game released in July 2022, is getting featured in October 2026.

But it gets worse. Article should be available at Push Square🔗

Reading the Article

The headline makes it sound as if the trophy hunt itself is the story, rather than the game. That's already a fairly thin premise for a featured article.

Right at the start, the author reveals that the trophy was earned on 23 July 2022, yet the feature is being published in October 2026. Essentially, we're getting a four-year-old platinum journal entry, complete with a detour into the author's cats.

Oh, did I say journal entry? Perhaps I was being too kind. There are only two sentences about the trophy journey itself:

One Trophy concerns the first time you're chased by those horrid little creatures called Zurks; you need to escape them without once being caught. I remember that being a pain point for many people.

Moreover, the author uses promotional screenshots instead of screenshots from his own playthrough. There's something inherently wrong with that in a personal retrospective. It's as if the author is afraid of saying, "I actually played this, and here's something worth showing you."

Instead, we get a two-sentence personal anecdote accompanied by the publisher's promotional photography.

Jeez, some effort would be nice. What is this? Some sort of nepotism or favoritism that got this article promoted to a featured spot? I wonder what happened in the editorial room...

What Probably Happened in the Editorial Room

Push Square The Stray Feature Approval Meeting

Conference Room B. Friday, 16:30.

Editor: I want to write about Stray.

Staff Writers: It's a four-years-old game.

Editor: I want to write it so I can also write about my cat.

Staff Writers: That's nice, everyone loves cat, but this is a PlayStation gaming website.

Editor: I'll write about how I platinumed it.

Staff Writers: Oh, okay, that can work. Did you do something interesting with the platinum?

Editor: I played the game and got the trophies.

Staff Writers: ...Right. When did you do this?

Editor: July 2022

Staff Writer: We're in October 2026. Can you least get some interesting screenshots from your playthrough? Something that illustrates your experience.

Editor: I've selected these lovely promotional images from the press kit.

Staff Writer Those aren't your screenshots.

Editor: Correct. It will also need to be featured article

Others: I'm afraid we can't greenlight this.

The editor slowly rises from his chair. Somewhere in the distance, a cat knocks a glass off a table.

Editor: BY THE POWER OF MY PENIS, YOU WILL OBEY AND MAKE THIS A FEATURED ARTICLE

Silence

Editor-in-Chief: Put it on the homepage.

Unless anyone has a better explanation?